Assalamu alaikum, which is probably why his antics of late have had me in such an uproar! As I’ve mentioned before, or maybe I’ve not, I can’t remember, when Akon first came out, well, when I first heard is song “Locked Up”, I was sitting on the bus, getting ready to leave Memphis, on my way back home. I thought to myself, “Who is this”? Yep, I had one of those “who is that” moments, similar to when I first heard Youssou Ndour, Salif Keita, Thione Seck, Mariah Carey, Whitney Houston, India.arie, and well, probably more artists I can’t think of right now. It’s late here, ya know.
But anyway, so I’m sitting on the bus, thinking “who is this”? And I remember hearing an interview with him on MTV Radio on XM Radio, and I was like “well OK, whatever”, wasn’t too impressed.
So then I started researching online about him, read his life history well I should say, read what was available online about him, and, well, I think I kind of put him on some sort of a pedestal, you know, the kind you put people on when they’ve overcome some sort of odds, either real or imagined, and you just think “wow, what a great person to have done that”.
And I just well, liked his music, his first album didn’t have the explicit language, didn’t have so much of the “gangsta” stuff as his second album had on it.
And I was completely repulsed by that song with Snoop Dogg “I Wanna Love You”, except the uncensored version doesn’t use the word “love”, and I was like “yuck” and promptly changed the station, though the uncensored version of the song does get to me! His songs are very catchy and I’ve found myslef singing to them, even if I don’t want to.
So the polygamy stuff, the dancing with the girl, the throwing the kid off stage, well, that’s just left me disappointed! Why? I don’t know. I think when you’re a celebrity, singer, whatever, things just go to your head, all the women, people wanting to get close to you because of who you are, just so they can say they know you, well, I think it would be hard not to let that get to a person’s head!
Whether Akon practices polygamy, or just has a bunch of women, I think I can say Alhamdulillah, that I’m not in that sort of a situation and say Mashallah that his wife can handle it, because I don’t think I could, and still remain true to Islam. Calling someone your “wife” without having the requisite stuff Islamicly, does not a wife make! And if he’s just plain being unfaithful, well, that I can’t handle!
To me, it’s not so much about “not wanting to share my man”, but it’s an issue of trust, as well as personal health/safety on my part! If I know that my man was being unfaithful, even though I could handle it emotionally or mentally, well, I’d not want him bringing something back home with him!
Anyway, I’m getting dangerously close to rehashing, so I’ll stop for now, and say that his personal life is his business but please don’t bring Islam into it when “Islam” don’t got nothing to do with it!
Anyway, so despite all of htis, I wish I could say “I’ll never listen to his music again”. But unfortunately, I can’t do that! I hear an Akon song and feel myself involuntarily bobbing my head! And not just with Akon, a lot of stuff that I know I shouldn’t be listening to! And this gives me a lot of trouble! I wonder if I’ll be questioned about it on Yaum al Qiyama, and to be honest it frightens me!
And I can’t say to Allah, well, it’s Akon’s fault, or Stevie’s fault, or 50 Cent’s fault, or Youssou’s fault, or anyone else’s, my actions are my own!
Praying was easy for me, fasting was easy, hijab was easy, so much of adopting Islam and making it a part of my life was easy for me, but giving up music, and popular music, is ever so hard for me, Subhanallah!
And another confession… I’ve always wanted to meet people that I admire, or whose music/writing/lectures/whatever have made an impact in my life! Just to say, “hey, you’ve made a difference”, not to go gah gah over the fact that they’re some kind of “famous person”. However, is my interesting in wanting to meet said people, in and of itself, a sign that I do indeed put certain people on a pedestal?
Just some meandering thoughts on a late Sunday evening. And did you know that I used to want to be a singer? And I’ve been told, and thought that I could do it. But my father advised me that I should pursue something more “practical” as being a singer would not guarantee me success!
And now, I just don’t think I could deal with the celebrity of it! Not to mention the religious restrictions. I just don’t think I could handle it, and we wonder why celebrities end up, many of them anyway, using drugs, womanizing, drinking, and all other manner of not so good behavior. That and all of their mistakes and mis-steps are out there for the whole world to see.
So while I still like to sing, yep, I do, I don’t think I’d want to be Akon’s next artist to be signed to his lable (singing nasheeds no doubt lol).
Anyway, sorry guys, I’m sure I’ve lost you by now! I need to go to bed, I’ve got work tomorrow. So anyway, yep, I admit it, I like Akon’s music, wish I could say I didn’t, but sadly… But I don’t like his behavior, and if he’s a Muslim, well, Inshallah, he will be led in a different direction than he seems to be going now. Allah alone knows best.
And I’m going now. I need to sleep. Perhaps I’ll take this post down. I’ve found of late I don’t like putting too much of my “real” self, i.e., my deep thoguths, struggles, personal feelings, etc., out there for everyone to read. It makes me feel vulnerable, exposed, etc. And I don’t much like it!
My strong reaction to Akon’s antics of late isn’t so much about the events in and of themselves, as they are about my own personal experiences with men, how Islam has been used to justify people’s behavior, my experiences with abuse, infidelity, etc., so it’s just not about Akon’s behavior but for osme strange reason, it brought up a whole host of feelings that I’d thought I’d dealt with, and perhaps have not.
